What Couples Who Stay Together Do Differently from Couples Who Don’t

Open and Honest Communication

What Couples Who Stay Together Do Differently

  • Talk and con­nect every day
  • Practice lis­ten­ing with the intent to understand
  • Work at under­stand­ing their partner’s world
  • Show respect rather than contempt
  • Assume their part­ner has a legit­i­mate point of view
  • Ask them­selves, “Do you want to be right, or do you want to happy?”

Everyday Demonstration of Caring Behaviors

Find out their partner’s “love lan­guage” and which of the fol­low­ing he/she needs to feel loved, then prac­tice doing them.

  • Words of affirmation
  • Spending qual­i­ty time
  • Doing acts of service
  • Giving phys­i­cal touch
  • Giving gifts

Ask their partner: 

What is one thing I could do dif­fer­ent­ly that would make the biggest dif­fer­ence to you?”

Tell their partner:

Something that would make me hap­py is…”


  1. I just had a won­der­ful con­fer­sa­tion with my hus­band. We talked about things we have nev­er talked about before . I believe we came to under­stand eachother bet­ter. and I clicked you on by acci­dent. I was actu­al­ly down­load­ing your pic­ture of birds in the sun­set when I got your web sight and decid­ed­to click onto this sub­ject. thank-you I feel so much clos­er to my hus­band then I have in months.possible years.

    • Thank you for tak­ing the time to share this with me. It makes me hap­py to know you now feel clos­er. Intimate com­mu­ni­ca­tion is won­der­ful, isn’t it! I have oth­er inven­to­ries to stim­u­late con­ver­sa­tion that I would be hap­py to share with you. Please let me know if you would be interested.

      Enjoy the pic­ture of the birds. They were tak­en by pho­tog­ra­ph­er Jerry Downs. If you like those images, you might want to check out jerrydownsphoto.com or fol­low his Facebook posts.

      Thank you again for your love­ly response.


        • I will be send­ing you some attach­ments via email. I love sup­port­ing healthy rela­tion­ships. Thank you for being inter­est­ed in enhanc­ing yours.

  2. Rosalie,

    I tried email­ing you the attach­ments, but the mes­sage bounced back. It appears I don’t have your cor­rect email address. If you would like me to send you more mate­ri­als on cou­ples com­mu­ni­ca­tion, please email me at info@jenniferdowns.net or sub­mit a mes­sage through my Contact page so I have your cor­rect address.

    Thank you!