If you are recently divorced, not in a significant love relationship, or have been single for a while, Valentine’s Day may bring up feelings of loneliness, emptiness, and feelings of self-doubt.
If this is your experience, you are certainly not alone. Honoring these feelings and avoiding activities that trigger them is important. The good news is there is another way to look at this day dedicated to love that can give you a whole new perspective.
Here are some tips for enjoying Valentine’s Day as a single person:
- Don’t compare yourself to others who are coupled up. Just because a couple is out celebrating doesn’t mean they are experiencing the “bliss” of romance on Valentine’s Day. They may be experiencing as much disappointment as you for different reasons.
- Catch up on past friendships. Go out with a friend of your choice, commiserate, eat, drink, and do whatever you want.
- This year, you get to dress for yourself. Wear your most outrageous or most casual outfit.
- Have a party with other singles or look for community gatherings. There are many activities listed in the newspaper and online.
- Take a dance lesson or go dancing. It’s a great way to meet others, revive your mind and body, get in touch with your sensuality, and just have fun.
- Honor your own feelings in ways others may not have. Let yourself feel however you do and not have to justify them to anyone.
- Stay home and watch a great DVD of your choice without having to check to see if someone else likes or has seen it.
- Get out of your head and into your heart by volunteering. There is a huge drop off in volunteers, but not of those in need, after the holidays. Soup kitchens and other organizations still need your help.
- Devote the time, caring, and money you might otherwise spend on someone else on yourself. Buy yourself gourmet chocolates of your choice, get a massage, take a bubble bath, go for a walk in nature, or go to the coast alone or with a friend, whichever makes you feel good.
- Rediscover and spend the day with the hottest, smartest, and most interesting person you know — you!
See Rebuilding When Your Relationship Ends for details on my support group.